


Quiet Little Voices (I'll Run To You)

by axolotlNerd, Thelynnlynn



Category: Game Grumps, Ninja Sex Party (Band), Skyhill (Band), Starbomb (Band), The Northern Hues (Band)
Genre: F/M, Finally a good story by me, Happy Ending, Love, Soulmates, mute!reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-24 19:10:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10747998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/axolotlNerd/pseuds/axolotlNerd, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thelynnlynn/pseuds/Thelynnlynn
Summary: You could hear him when he sang. And you loved it. You loved him. But how could you find him if he could never hear you the way you did him?





	Quiet Little Voices (I'll Run To You)

You were about eight when you fell in love with music. 

 

At first, you were just annoyed with the singing voice in your head. Whoever he was, he loved to sing. And he sucked. For eight years of your life, you just hated music because he sucked at singing, and he was always there. Like an earworm.

Everyone had it, though. Of course, most kids loved the little singer in their heads. In fact, it made people interested in music when they surely wouldn’t have been if they didn’t have an earworm in their head all the time. 

When you were young and you first asked about the voice, your parents were filled with joy. Some people had been born not hearing their soulmate’s voice at all, or sometimes, just without a soul mate. That’s what it was, they told you. Your soulmate just loved music but sucked at singing because they were a little kid. 

You tried to just ignore him. To hear something, anything other than his voice. But it went deeper than that. It wasn’t the fact you didn’t like his voice. In fact, you didn’t like many forms of singing at all. 

You remembered the crash like it was yesterday. You’d been merely five years old when it happened, parents lost in an argument about something long forgotten as they drove. Then someone swerved, drunk on the road. Smashing into the side of the car and causing the tires to burn as they screeched on the asphalt. Feeling the handle of the door smash into your throat before you wheezed out a pained scream. 

But you all made it out alive. Mom may have broken her arm, and dad would have trouble walking straight for a few weeks, but you were fine. Mostly.

But you couldn’t speak. The blunt trauma to your esophagus and vocal cords had been too much, and now they were broken. Laughing was the same wheezing noise as crying was all of a sudden. 

And you couldn’t sing. You’d never sing again. 

Maybe you’d sung once or twice, given some sort of signal that you were  _ here, _ you were  _ alive _ and you could maybe someday  _ find _ each other. Maybe you’d done that. But you didn’t know. 

So for three long, excruciating years, you hated music. You hated singing because you couldn’t. You just couldn’t handle the thought that he was out there and he didn’t know, would never know because of some asshole who was drunk and decided today was a good day for a drive. 

But soon, he got better at singing. You’d find yourself smiling and wishing you could hum along with the songs that you knew. There would be one song in particular, completely in another language, that he’d sing that you found he was quite good at. Then one day, he sang it with a nervousness in his voice that you didn’t think he had. He’d always been so confident. Then he never sang it again.

Years passed, and you could still hear him but never speak. He sang a lot of Rush, something you found yourself beginning to love. But it didn’t feel like enough, listening to him. If you could have chosen to speak one sentence after that crash, it would have been to him. 

_ “I’m still here.” _

That was probably the worst part of having to live with this disability. You’d learned sign language and could force neat hand-writing, so you could easily convey what you wanted. But people forgot you were there so easily. Like you’d faded out of conversation. Out of mind.

But you got by. That was the important part. You survived, at the very least.

 

It was one day, late at night during the summer of your junior year that you heard him singing a new song. A soft, lullaby-like one that you’d never heard before. 

_ I… Haven’t heard you call. _

_ Are you there at all? _

He was talking to you. He was calling out to you and asking for you to say something. Asking for someone to answer.

_ Well, I hope you don’t just pass me by.  _

_ So for now, just hear this lullaby. _

_ “I’m here! I can hear you! I’m right here, please just listen to me!” _ You felt like the faded ghost of a spirit long dead, no longer able to speak to people. You could just hear and scream, but no one would hear you. 

But he wrote a song for you. He wrote a song, and it was beautiful. You didn’t know how you knew he made that, but you knew he did. You just knew it.

 

But time passed. Dan would sing his lullaby to you sometimes, and you found it comforting to know he still thought of you. Because he did. Constantly. 

Brian and Rachel had found each other, even through the difficulties. Dan found it heartwarming, really. He just wished he could find that. He was stunned, to say the least, when he heard that Arin and Suzy found each other at only thirteen years old.

But he didn’t know what he would do. He just wanted to know. Had he just been born with no soulmate? Or had they died when they were young and he couldn’t remember if he’d ever heard them? What happened?

He just hoped the little hints he’d dropped were enough. Singing random tunes and putting his name in there, so if someone was listening, they’d know where to find him. He’d hoped the times he’d muttered the Game Grumps theme would reach someone, let them know what he was doing. 

You’d picked up. The first time you’d heard him sing a real song, with music and everything that he wrote. Danny Sexbang, he’d said. You knew that couldn’t have been his real name, but it was worth a try. 

And you found him. You found the band called Ninja Sex Party, and you smiled at every one of those songs because you’d heard them before anyone else. You were the first to hear all of them and they were even more hilarious knowing he’d made a whole band around those silly songs. 

You wanted desperately to just go to where he was. But where was the proof? How could you tell him that you’d been hearing him for years, wishing you could say something? There just wasn’t a way to show it. 

So you waited. For a while, you’d just give up. Why keep trying to find him, anyways? It just wasn’t going to happen, right?

But then you’d hear that song. The little lullaby he’d written for you. You’d hear it and know you can’t give up because he was waiting. And he’d keep waiting. Because finally, someone hadn’t forgotten you.

 

You vividly remember the day your best friend met her soulmate. The millions of small locks of vivid orange curls stopped clean at her shoulders, she’d always somehow keep tamed. She was tall and had dark, passionate brown eyes that knew exactly how to express emotion.

You’d been in the sixth grade when she approached you and spoke. In sign language. 

_ “Hi! I’m Meg. How are you?” _ She’d signed, slowly. She was very unsure of what she was doing. You just looked at her, stunned. 

_ “I’m good. You?”  _ You’d replied with. She smiled largely, giving a big thumbs up. 

You eventually told her that she could talk to you, making her exclaim “Oh! I thought you were deaf!” You laughed, the sound coming out as gruff huffing. You pulled out a pad of sticky notes, something you kept with you just in case you needed to say something. 

“Nope, mute.” You wrote, showing it to her. She nodded. 

“Oh, weird. I’d been wondering why you never talked. At first I just thought you were shy, but then I asked my sister about it and she said that you were deaf and she’d seen you talking in sign language to your parents, so I decided I’d learn it so I could talk to you because you seem cool!” 

_ This girl is talkative. _ Was your first thought. It’s not like you minded, though. She knew how to carry a one-sided conversation well, which was good. She was also eager to learn sign language, so you taught her. You just clicked the moment you met. 

You two found an affinity for one cafe not far from the school. It was a short walk, and God, they had the best tea flavors you’d ever tried. You and Meg would work your way through the menu of coffees and tea while you talked about any and everything. 

Of course, the inevitable question came around when she’d ask about your soulmate. The little earworm in you. 

_ “I bet you know by now that it’s complicated. He can’t exactly hear me.” _ You signed. 

“I know. Sorry to bring it up, it’s probably not a super happy topic.” 

_ “What about you? You haven’t found them, have you?” _ You signed. Meg smiled brightly. 

“No, but he likes the same music I do. Stuff like Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana, that jazz. I really want to meet him, though. I’ve been thinking about making a little tune to tell him my name and stuff, so he doesn’t just call me ‘that girl that sometimes sings in my head’, y’know?”

 

It was another ten years after that she found him. You’d been about twenty-six years old, passing by a bar while listening to her talk about this new book she’d fallen in love with when she paused. You looked at her inquisitively, watching as her face shifted. 

“Do you hear that singing too?” She asked incredulously. You listened, hearing a faint guitar playing somewhere in the distance. Your face immediately mimicked her stunned look before you bolted in the direction of the guitar, trying to find the person.

“Tuhin!” She yelled. She ended up making that sing, singing it and getting a reply simply saying his name was Tuhin. You turned a corner, seeing a stunned man sitting on the ground, a guitar in his hands and a case for it at his feet, a few stray dollars and coins in it. He had caramel skin, and large, dark brown eyes, similar to Meg’s. Black hair was kept moderately long, pulled to the side as he jumped from his spot and ran to Meg, immediately hugging her. 

“Holy shit,” He muttered, eyes still wide as he held Meg tightly. You smiled at the sight, though you couldn’t help the twinge of jealousy in your stomach as you watched. 

_ Why can’t I have that? _

 

“Do not tell me you’re just looking at pictures of him again.” Meg said to you, suddenly in front of you. Almost another decade later, you found yourself still living in the same town you’d grown up in. Meg had moved, finding a home in Chicago with Tuhin and three dogs. She still visited, though. 

You turned off your phone quickly, turning the face around so she wouldn’t see the pictures you’d been looking through. It was a bad habit, honestly. You knew you should be doing something like actually trying to meet Dan, but it felt pointless. Why would he believe some mute fangirl, after all? 

You hugged Meg, smiling as she talked to you about everything. She’d become a teacher at some fancy private high school, and she absolutely loved talking about the kids in her classes. You thought you knew how catching up would go this time; she’d talk about the kids, and then the dogs, and someday soon, she’d talk about having kids of her own. She hadn’t yet, but you knew it was bound to happen. 

But that wasn’t how it went. At all. “So I did some reading up, a bit of studying, yadda yadda yadda. You know what I found out?” You shrugged. “Dan talked about you on Game Grumps.” You gasped. Meg smiled. “Yeah! Don’t worry, I actually want to watch the video with you so you can hear what he said.”

She pulled out her phone, pulling up the video, Interview With The Grumps, and giving you an earbud.

“Yeah, so a lot of people have been asking, what about your soulmate?” Arin said as you watched the spiralling orange. 

“Oh, yeah.”  _ His voice. _ It felt so familiar and yet you felt like you’d never heard it. “Well, I kind of… Haven’t heard from her. I mean, there’s no confirmation on whether I have a soulmate or if she passed away or what-not, but I’m keeping hope. I mean… Ugh, this is gonna sound cheesy as shit. I have this feeling she’s out there. Like, it could have been a dream, but I could have sworn I heard her when I was a kid.” Dan explained. You felt your heart pounding in your chest. 

“What if they, like, can’t sing? Like, physically? That’s why you’ve never heard them?”

“Wow. I actually haven’t thought of that. Like, mute? Maybe.” Meg paused the video, pure joy on her face as she looked at you. 

“And? What do you think?” You shrugged in reply. 

_ “How would I prove it, though?” _ You signed. 

“You know in more ways than just singing. When we found Tuhin, it wasn’t just his voice that made me know.” She had a look of genuine sympathy on her face, something she wore well. “You can’t just live listening to your rockstar boyfriend from the sidelines. In fact, I already saved up some money for us to go to the next Game Grumps Live panel, so unless you’ve got something planned…”

You shook your head vigorously. 

“Great. It’s in a month. Think you can handle that much more waiting?” 

_ “I’ve been waiting thirty-six years for this. I can handle another month.” _

 

That month was the most excruciatingly long one in your life. You’d go to sleep at night, just wondering. Would he sing tonight? Would you hear that lullaby he wrote so long ago? Or would tonight be the night he lost faith in meeting you? 

But you kept hope. You  _ had _ to.

And then the day came, where you sat in the passenger’s seat while Meg drove, clenching your teeth. She kept talking, trying to reassure you. “How bad can it be? He’s like, the world’s nicest guy. Right next to Tom Hiddleson, for Christ’s sake! I mean, even if he doesn’t believe you, at least he’ll be nice about it. And in the meantime, you can distract yourself with all the Pokemon or anime merch you want, nerd. This is a convention, after all.”

She could tell it wasn’t enough when you laid back the seat and rolled over on your side, facing the car doors away from her. 

“Don’t be such a wuss. If it makes you feel better, try to think of some way to prove it. And hell, I believe you, don’t I? If push comes to shove, you’ve got me. To stick up for you or just take you in as my own.” She said, smiling. 

You spent the rest of the trip just laying there in thought.

 

All the merch did distract you. Albeit temporarily, as you started hearing Dan’s vocal warm-ups in you hear. It always made you smile, the sound of him making seemingly random noises. 

But that meant the panel was soon. Oh, God, and then after the panel is the signing, where you’d actually meet him. And then you’d have to try and convince him that he’s your  _ fucking soulmate _ in two minutes or less so you wouldn’t hold up the line. And then what? Move to California with him? Or would he move in with you? Or would it just not be able to work because he’s a famous God-damned rockstar and you’re just some girl that can’t talk? 

Meg watched as you stared through the plush you were holding. She tapped your shoulder, pulling you out of your thoughts. “The panel starts in an hour. You… You sure you okay up there?” She said, a hand patting your head softly. You breathed in deeply before nodding, putting the plush back in it’s place. 

 

The panel was good. You found yourself getting surprisingly lax as you laughed at jokes and the funny questions people asked. People looked at you oddly for your weird sounding laughs, but you ignored it.

But oh, boy, when it ended. 

_ “Maybe we should just leave.” _ You signed to Meg. She shook her head, curls flailing wildly in her sternness and determination. 

“Nope. It’s too late. We gotta do this.” She said sternly. You sighed, following her as she lead you to the signing.

The long line only made you more stressed out. More certain that it just wasn’t time. That you should just give up. But Meg stood her ground, not even letting you move to go to the bathroom. The line felt infinitely long and short at the same time. Like this would simultaneously never end and  _ Oh God it’s about to happen. _

Then the few people in front of you moved on, excitedly looking at the signatures they’d gotten. You looked at them for a moment before turning, seeing him there. 

You almost passed out from sheer cluelessness. But he just smiled reassuringly. Meg laughed, walking up to Dan. 

“Hi! I’m Meg.” She introduced you quickly as you stood there, probably the color of a tomato as you looked at Dan. “She’s mute, so excuse her silence.” Meg said like it was  _ some casual fucking meeting. _ But Dan just made a surprised expression as he nodded. 

“Oh! It’s good to meet you two.” He said, smiling. Meg looked at you, the simple look screaming ‘You can do this’. You walked up to him shaking his hand. 

The idea struck you like lightning. You quickly pulled out your pad of sticky notes and a pencil, writing neatly but hurriedly. Desperate to get the words out as fast as possible, before they faded from your memory. 

You handed him the sticky note and walked off before anyone could say anything. 

 

When you got back to your hotel room, you sulked. You’d fucked it up. You’d definitely fucked it up. There was no way you couldn’t have, right? Maybe you could try again in a few years, maybe he’ll forget you and then you can try again. Or maybe you’ll fuck up even worse and-

“Dude. Don’t act like you’ve lost yet. He’s probably busy, y’know? Your famous rockstar boyfriend and all. What’d you even write on that note?” Meg asked. She hadn’t chased after you immediately, but when she did, she didn’t mention it. She just put an arm around your shoulder as you shook from the aftershock. 

But you kept on brooding, just lying in the bed as you thought about the words you wrote. It probably would have worked, too. Had you just been a bit more patient, a bit stronger, just waited a little bit-

“Welp! I’m gonna leave if you’re not gonna talk about it. I’ll go get some food. Be back soon. Hey, and,” She paused, making you look up at her. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. Maybe things’ll work out in the end, y’know?”

You scoffed and turned again, returning to laying down on the bed as Meg left. 

 

Dan still had the sticky note, reading it over again.

 

_ I haven’t heard you call. _

_ Are you there at all? _

_ Well, I hope you don’t just pass me by.  _

_ So for now just hear this lullaby. _

 

It had to be her. There was no way it wasn’t her. He’d been reeling when you’d walked away, feeling motionless as he realized it.

“Oh, shit. I’m sorry, I better-” Meg had just been about to run off with you when he called out. 

“Wait! Wait, no I- Can I- Fuck, this is gonna sound weird-” Dan stuttered, still faltering around everything that was happening. Meg stopped him as he ran a hand through his hair, smiling brightly. She pulled a pen from her pocket, grabbing the sticky note and writing in small, neat letters. “Holiday Inn Express; room 507”

“I gotta go, but once you’re not busy being famous, you better stop by. You’ve both been waiting a long time. See you!” Meg said before turning and running after you.

Dan walked back looking at the note, partially baffled. Arin peeked over at him. 

“Those two were gone fast. Did you get their phone numbers?” He asked, genuinely confused. 

“No! I mean- It’s complicated, I’ll explain it to you later.”

 

“I fucking knew it!” Arin exclaimed in the car. Dan was sitting in the passenger seat, a hand running through his hair as thought. “I told you she was out there. You’ve got too much love in your heart to  _ not _ have a soulmate.”

“Yeah, but… This is fucking crazy. I mean, no wonder I’d never heard from her. She was mute!” Dan exclaimed, a strange conflict of joy and sadness running through him. 

He was  _ not _ alone. 

He was  _ not _ different. 

He just had to wait a bit longer. 

“Should I take you there now? To that hotel?” Arin asked. 

“Yes!” Dan exclaimed, sudden joy and haste filling his veins.

 

And suddenly, he was almost there. Almost to Her. The one, picked out by destiny or fate or whatever. The one who’d been hearing that lullaby he’d made up so long ago. 

“Dan! Good, you’re here.” Meg said, smiling as usual. Dan felt himself stiffen up. 

“Wait, I- I have no clue what to say!” He said, his voice a hushed whisper. 

“Look, your soulmates, right? I’m, like, ninety percent sure that it’s impossible to fuck this up.” Meg said, a reassuring look on her face. 

“That’s not as sure as I wish it was.”

“I’ll go ninety-five, but no higher. Now go get ‘em, tiger!” She said happily before walking off, going into the elevator that Dan had just gotten out of. 

He walked down the hall, looking at the numbers on the doors. Staring down 507 when he got to it. Nervously knocking as he put the note in his pocket. 

You just assumed Meg had put her room key down in here and forgot to grab it. You pulled yourself up, stumbling as you regained your balance. You walked over to the door, opening it and looking up. 

_ Shit. _

You just stared at him, incredulously wishing you could talk right now. Say anything. He looked at you with a range of emotions, going anywhere from worried to happy in just a few minor shifts of the face. You almost felt like passing out again. 

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, you found yourself hugging him tightly, almost letting a few silent sobs out of you as he held you back just as tightly. “God, I- I don’t know what to say, I just- I’m so glad you found me.” He sounded like he was on the verge of crying too. You pulled away if only to see his face. You put your hand on his cheeks, checking to see if he was real. He smiled widely, putting one hand over one of yours, another still resting where it had been on your back during your hug. 

You wished, more than anything, you could say something right now. You wanted to tell him how good you thought his voice was, and how proud you were that he made his way all the way to singing on stage and having people laugh at his jokes for a job. You wanted to tell him that you wished you could talk to him because you’d be rambling for days if you could. 

“I missed you.” He said, pulling you into another hug as he rested his head on top of yours. As if you’d known each other for years and you just had to go on a little trip somewhere else. Just returning from vacation rather than just silence for years.

_ “I missed you too,” _ You thought. You know he couldn’t hear it, but it meant the world to you. To think that, even just for a minute, you could speak and be heard. 

In a way, he did hear it. Not in the way any voice would have said it, but in the way that you held him just a bit tighter after he said it. In the way that he felt softness encapture the area, like the whole world had paused for a moment just for this.

 

After everything in the hotel, you were confused. What would you guys do? Would you move in together? Or did you want to take things slow? Dan was persistent in saying he was fine with anything, but when you were even more persistent knowing what he wanted, he admitted he’d like it if you moved in. So you smiled and explained that you’d have to find a job and everything first, but as soon as you did, you’d be on your way. 

Of course, pictures got around quickly. Someone had snapped one of you handing Dan the sticky note and walking away, along with Meg writing something else down quickly. Reddit was on it like flies to garbage. 

Everyone had been making theories about Dan’s soulmate ever since the Interview With The Grumps video came out. Of course, when the pictures got out, theories went rampant. 

And you were scared out of your mind. What if they didn’t like you? What if they  _ really _ liked you and wanted you to be on the show? You couldn’t. What if people think you’re lying, like you thought Dan would? 

But Dan comforted you. He spoke softly when you expressed your fears to him. “That won’t happen, baby. And if it does, it’s not any of their business what happens between you and me. It won’t change a thing, I promise.” 

It really didn’t. You made a video with Dan to post to Grump Out, explaining what happened, who you were, and what those pictures were of. You were in the video, though it wasn’t like you said much. It did feel good to be so welcomed by the Grumps themselves, though. 

Suzy was on you straight away, welcoming you and hugging you. She’d heard the whole story and kept saying how smart that was, and that she was so glad things turned out okay. Ross seemed to have an affinity for you, too. He even had you over for just watching him do one of his animating streams. 

The fans had mixed responses when the video came out. A lot of people were glad Dan found his soulmate and was happy; there were far too many horror stories of finding your One True Love and it turning out to be some abusive prick. 

Other people were intent on making you the bad guy, saying things like “She’s just faking it to be with Dan”. But most people were against that. There was zero proof for it, and the Grumps were smart. Even if they didn’t act like it. 

 

“Hey, babe?” Dan asked one groggy morning. It’d been rainy and quiet all morning, nothing but the sounds of birds coming through the window. You gave him an inquisitive look. 

He just looked at you fondly for a moment, sleep still evident in his eyes. His hair was spilling onto the pillow underneath him, one arm tucked under his ear and the other resting on your waist. “I love you.” He said softly. You smiled, kissing him on the nose as a reply. 

_ “I love you too.” _ Had become the meaning for this action. He scrunched up his nose and lightly grunted as he pulled you closer. 

“Actually…” He thought for a moment. “Nah. I’m in love with you.” He murmured before half-falling asleep again. You just smiled, pulling yourself closer. 

_ “I’m in love with you, too.” _ You mouthed silently, trying to say it even though you knew it wouldn’t come out. 

Unfortunately, love doesn’t heal everything. The words still came out as nothing but hissing breath. But still, what’s wrong with being a little broken when you’re happy? 

 

Not broken. Just bent. 

 

And happy.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a slut for soulmate AUs~
> 
> Anyways, I just really wanted to thank you all for us getting 3000 hits on All At Once! I never could have imagined my first story would have gotten such great responses, but now it has. To all of you that read it, thank you so much, and to those of you that haven't, you should read it if sad stories are your thing. Sad and overdramatic. 
> 
> Once again, thank you all! 
> 
> ~Kathrine (axolotlNerd)


End file.
